Sorting Out our Expectations
Do you remember, when you were a child (perhaps), and you had a desire which you were certain was going to come true? Maybe you thought about it day and night, visualizing the glorious day when the desire would become reality. I remember those days. Believing that I could simply think something into existence. Not thinking that I had any part to play in the materialization of my desire. Seeing dozens of my presupposed deadlines pass by, until, ultimately I would move onto another desire. In children we call this phenomenon imagination. We may promote it in a child, as it is often a gateway to creativity.
In adults, unfulfilled expectations can have a different impact. Resentment, anger, or depression can be side affects. Instead of building and defining a person’s being, lost expectations can cause internalized thinking and a closing up of motives and desires. Disappointment all to often becomes a character trait. ‘Hateful’ people are often drowning in disappointment, lashing out at others whom they judge as happy or successful.
Whew, this is kind of a negative story. Stay with me for just a few more points, on the way towards a happy place!
Thanks for not aborting. Let’s think about it this way. Within the human is a spirit. It is that part of us which houses our intellect, emotions, fears, creativity, and our desires. This is where we may find joy and satisfaction. It is in our spirit that we conjure up suppositions and expectations, as well. Yet, it is a place where thought reigns, and is thereby within our control.
Man’s spirit is where the noise is. It is where the (mental)work is done. It is vulnerable to deceit, manipulation, and corruption, yet it is incredibly strong and resilient, able to squash unhealthy stimuli with a disciplined approach to conscious thought.
The spirit is also where the consciousness of the creator lives. Many times struck down, this innate knowledge burns on like an ember, giving the person a deep sense of value!
Ok, so toxic expectations are those which set standards on people that are unreasonable (except in the demander’s world). They…